Football is my favorite sport, hands down. No question. No contest. It just is. The intensity and the pace of the game is unparalleled to anything I've lived in my 31 years on Earth. Every Sunday my TV turns on at 1pm and by the time I go to turn it off around 11pm I'm disheveled, I've lost my voice, tears are running down my face, my retinas are detaching and I'm drunk. My wife, god bless her, knows that once September comes she's lost me on Sundays, Monday nights and sometimes even Thursdays and Saturdays. But after logging all of that time torturing my nerves on the rollercoaster that is the NFL season, what do I have to show for it come February, besides a heart condition? A backlog of memories formed around the amazing triumphs and failures of the players I have grown to love from my couch. So, without further ado, I give to you my top five players of the 2011 season.
5. Drew Brees: The man almost singlehandedly carried my fantasy football team to a surprise third place finish. Sure, third is last place in the winners bracket, but it also means I broke even and got my $100 back. There were games he'd rack up nearly 50 fantasy points all by himself. By the end of the year, I couldn't feel the wind blow without thinking of Brees. Oh, and he also set the record for most yards thrown in a season. No biggie.
4.Ndamukong Suh: Alright. The guy did some dirty things on the field. But it's football. It's not like he stomped on someone's bare head. And let's be real about this, he's not the first player to do dirty shit on the field. Have we already forgotten Bill Romanowski? He's remembered as a linebacker legend, but the guy was a dirty as they come, and he too kicked a guy in the head. Brandon Merriweather kicked a guy in the head in college. And Albert Haynesworth stomped a dude a few years ago while playing in Tennessee. Shit happens. It's a contact sport. If a player doesn't want get hurt, they should stop their crying and go play baseball or something. The fact of the matter is, before Suh came to the NFL the Lions were the laughing stock of the league. Since Suh, they have become one of the most feared competitors in the game. I applaud him for his ferocity and ability to intimidate his opponents and his fans.
3. Tom Brady: What's not to love. The man has fathered two children, one with the most successful supermodel of all time, the other with a drop-dead-gorgeous actress. While I'd typically fault someone for knocking up two different chicks, he's able to afford his child support, doesn't strike me as a dead beat dad, plus who can blame him for wanting to have sex with either of these women? And after this season, he further solidified his entrance to the Hall of Fame by breaking Dan Marino's record for most yards in a season. Sure he's second behind Brees, but his life's a hell of a lot cooler. And his team's in the Super Bowl.
2. Rob Gronkowski: He's just Gronk. Need I really say more? Really? Okay. Fine. This should sum it up:
90 Receptions.
1327 Yards
17 TDS
And Bibi Jones.
1. Billy Cundiff: If you didn't see this coming, then you clearly didn't see the AFC Championship game. I think I am now this guy's biggest fan. First of all, he is now Baltimore's Ray Finkle. That shit cracks me up. Second, he kicked the Patriots into the Super Bowl. Everyone in New England should love this guy. I can tell you now that I will be the proud owner of a Billy Cundiff football jersey. In fact, I may actually sport one for the Super Bowl. It should be said, also, that he did play for the Ravens, but he is by far my favorite Patriot this season. Without Cundiff's incredible clutch performance, the Pats would not be heading to Indy this weekend. And for that, I salute him. And I love him.
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